So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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