i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
