Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
there is puke in my bra ... again
God, I missed his penis.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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