Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
