I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
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You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
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MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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