It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
