Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
