Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize