That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
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i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You were trust falling into bushes
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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