rhymes with "ouble enetration"
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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