I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
