Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
