Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Randomize
