is your mom at the bar?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize