is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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