The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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