Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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