Kiss
Puke
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
