i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm just crazy horny about you
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
