I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
