Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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