I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
His nipple licking is glorious
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