There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
