youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
