After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize