You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
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Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
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I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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