You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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