I accidentally had phone sex last night
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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