It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
you inspire me to be a worse person
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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