I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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