She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...