May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
