There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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