I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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