Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
