How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Randomize
