I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
she pinky promised me she was 18
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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