He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
