I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
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