I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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