After last night, I could never be a politician.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
