I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
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