I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
i think i just lost a toe
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
