you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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