Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
