Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
