Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
