Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
youre lurking in front of me
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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