your room smells of hookers.
And success
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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