Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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