My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
