I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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